That's what Complementarianism is at its fin"est – and if more of us men got this rather than making excuses about our own sinful habits, our wives would benefit all the more and people might start seeing it for the beautiful thing it actually is. It is designed to protect and cause her to flourish richly in God's design for marriage, not for objectifying or denigrating her, or other women. You don't do it for praise from her or anyone else, or merely when she's looking. You suck it up, get tough on yourself, and love her regardless of whether or not you see the benefit. You work your butt off each and every day, come home and help with the kids and household, lead her in a loving manner toward Christ so that in you, she might see Him more clearly. The idea is one of leading through meekness, which to rob my pastor of yet another gem of wisdom, is strength; it is simply strength under control.
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